Archives For July 2019

New IBSA training helps ministry leaders prevent sexual abuse

Child Protection“You’re not going to leave this training feeling uplifted.”

Mark Emerson introduced a new IBSA workshop on creating a safe environment for children with a sobering series of statistics:

  • 90% of sexual abuse victims are abused by someone they know and trust.
  • 66% of those victims don’t report the abuse until they are an adult.
  • Just 10% of offenders ever come into contact with the criminal justice system.

Emerson, IBSA’s associate executive director for the Church Resources Team, teamed up with Next Generation Ministries director Jack Lucas to offer the training at First Baptist Church in Morton May 16. The workshop was held as the Southern Baptist Convention considered its response to sexual abuse involving SBC leaders and churches. The denomination took action at its June annual meeting, including a “Caring Well Challenge” designed to help churches prevent future abuse and care well for survivors

In Morton, Emerson and Lucas shared that there are 60 million sexual abuse survivors in the United States. An astonishing one in five Americans will be sexually abused before the age of 18. Statistically, that data means 14 people in the average IBSA church are survivors of sexual abuse.

“Part of the problem is in our churches we don’t want to acknowledge that there is a problem,” Lucas said. “It happens in small churches, in large churches, small towns, and in big cities.”

A recent LifeWay Research study found 32% of Southern Baptist churchgoers believe many more Protestant pastors have sexually abused children or teens than have been brought to light (43% disagreed and 25% said they don’t know). Of those surveyed, 4% said they knew of someone attending their church who had sexually abused a child, but it has not yet come to light.

“Perceptions are reality,” said Scott McConnell, executive director of LifeWay Research. “When almost a third of churchgoers sense there is an avalanche of abuse and assault cases coming, Protestant churches must address this head-on, even if few say they actually know someone whose abuse is still hidden.”

Identify ‘grooming’ behavior
At the IBSA training, Emerson and Lucas identified three types of abusers. The first is the abduction offender who has no previous relationship with the victim. Abduction offenders comprise 4% of abusers. More common is the peer-to-peer offender. “All bad behavior of a sexual nature is not from adults,” Lucas noted. “There’s been a 300% increase within schools in the last 3-4 years. More than 50% of reported abuse cases in Illinois are actually peer-to-peer.”

The third, most dangerous type is the preferential offender—someone whose victim knows and trusts them. One statistic says 90% of child victims of sexual abuse know the perpetrator. “Check-in systems do not work against preferential offenders,” Lucas said. “We can’t recognize the risk visually. We have to recognize risk behaviorally.”

That’s why it’s so important that churches learn to recognize the grooming process, the IBSA trainers said in Morton. “Grooming” refers to tactics an abuser uses in his or her relationship with a child to facilitate abuse.

When an offender is seeking to abuse a victim, he or she is generally looking to do so through deception, not violence, Emerson explained. And the abuser isn’t just grooming the victim, but also the gatekeepers—a pastor, the parents, church leaders. Grooming is about gaining access to the kids, and groomers often seek out career and volunteer opportunities related to children in churches.

“If there is somebody taking pictures, too much interaction, making friends with a couple to make friends with their child…You need to take note,” Emerson said. “There’s always that guy. If it’s done over the top you’ve got to take note of that.”

Emerson further described the groomer as someone who “appears helpful, trustworthy, and kind. He’s already picked out the child at your church. He knows what the targeted child wants or needs. He is skilled at age-specific communication.”

Groomers often target children who are:

  • unconnected, on the fringe, or in need;
  • seeking someone to follow or trust;
  • from a broken family or single-parent home, or seeking a father figure; or
  • already involved with alcohol or drugs, or pornography.

According to Emerson, a groomer will seek to introduce nudity and sexual touch into the relationship. He’ll do this through barrier testing and erosion, such as taking a child or youth home by himself after an event. Sexual discussion and joking will seep into conversations. Playful touch and “accidental nudity” might be introduced. He will create a culture where nudity and sex is acceptable or cool, including sharing magazines and movies.

Once he has succeeded in abusing his victim, the groomer will work to keep the victim silent through shame, embarrassment, and threats.

Create safer policies and procedures
Emerson and Lucas urged churches to have child protection policies in place, including a purpose statement and clear definition of terms. “When you say child, youth, adult, staff, volunteer, approved worker, who are you talking about?” asked Lucas. “What do we mean when we say ‘child’? Is an adult someone age 21 and above?”

The next step is to define what it means to be an approved worker. This entails an application, background check, reference check, and safety training. “MinistrySafe is the best one we have found,” Lucas said, referencing the national organization dedicated to equipping churches in the area of preventing sexual abuse and ministering to victims.

A group tasked with studying abuse in Southern Baptist churches released in June a free 12-session video curriculum for churches. “Becoming a Church that Cares Well for the Abused” is available at churchcares.com.

There are some policy points that must be mandatory for churches, Emerson and Lucas said. For example, a two-adult rule protects children and the church, while also shielding workers in the room from a false accusation. If at all possible, do not put spouses together, the trainers advised. They also encouraged:

  • a minimum 6-month attendance rule for all workers;
  • approved-worker status;
  • clear sight lines into each classroom; and
  • check-in and release procedures.

If abuse has occurred, it’s important that churches offer professional counseling for those who are suffering, Lucas said. “In the life of a victim, something is really wrong and we as a church need to love that victim. We need to show them we care and want to protect them.”

For more resources on preventing sexual abuse in your church and caring well for survivors of abuse, go to IBSA.org/protect.

By Steve Playl

Declaration of Independence grunge America map flag

Picnics in the park, cookouts with families, visits to historic places, yardwork, parades down Main Street, extravagant pyrotechnic displays!

These are as American as baseball, hot dogs and apple pie and are appropriate ways to celebrate Independence Day. But while celebrating the Fourth and enjoying our present freedoms, may I suggest that we take a look back, then let’s look to the future.

Look back to July 4, 1776, when Thomas Jefferson, assisted by such patriarchs as Ben Franklin and John Adams, completed the final wording of the document presented to the Second Continental Congress, which evolved into the birth certificate of the United States of America.

That document, the Declaration of Independence, was eventually signed by 56 men who pledged their lives, their fortunes and their sacred honor to secure the opportunity for an experiment in democratic government. And it led to the greatest free nation the world has ever seen.

Although the “self-evident truth that all men are created equal” was not yet understood as meaning that all human beings of both genders and all races are equal in the sight of the Creator, the document has become the capstone of freedom for all Americans.

As we celebrate our freedom, let’s remember that it came at a great cost to those who went before us — and that our freedom from sin’s penalty was paid for by our Savior with His divine sacrifice…

Although the meaning of “endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights” has been misrepresented at times from many different directions, those rights have been fought for, debated and paraded through the streets of this nation for more than 240 years. Some, in the name of tolerance, have insisted that their rights include forcing others to comply with their wishes. Others, insisting on their understanding of “science,” have argued against the reality of a Creator. Many have added their own desires to the list of “life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.”

Still the Declaration of Independence is one of the greatest human documents ever created, and it represents a magnanimous vision for all — a “land of the free and home of the brave.”

Four score and seven years later, Abraham Lincoln pointed out in his Gettysburg Address that the nation could possibly perish. That speech was made during the deadliest and most devastating war in America’s history. Many wars before and after have cost us dearly in the blood of our sons and daughters, but most of our conflicts have been with “outsiders” and America has been united in battle. The “Civil” War, on the other hand, divided our nation against itself.

Now, two hundred, two score and three years after the states united to declare independence from Great Britain, we find ourselves divided by politics, policies, power struggles, and pride. Too few of our leaders seem willing to sacrifice personal feelings and ideas for the greater good of the masses. While there will never be unanimous agreement on every conviction, surely we can agree to place far greater priority on negotiating with our fellow Americans than negotiating with our avowed enemies.

My prayer is that our precious grandchildren will grow up in an America somewhat like the one where I grew up. With all its faults, it has been the greatest nation throughout all of history.

But if that future is to become reality, more of us must return to the God of our Fathers in repentance, humility, prayer and commitment. We must again become a nation with common sense. We must use the word tolerance as something more than political rhetoric. We must again practice compassion, even while passionately defending differing points of view. And, yes, we must also stand for truth as revealed by our Creator.

As we celebrate our freedom, let’s remember that it came at a great cost to those who went before us — and, all the more, that our freedom from sin’s penalty was paid for by our Savior with His divine sacrifice on the cross, which calls for the most serious of celebrations.

Steve Playl, a retired Baptist pastor, is a chaplain at a Bristol, Tenn., hospital, a newspaper columnist and college instructor. Reprinted from Baptist Press.

Evangelicals divided on border fix
The recent response of Christian leaders to the situation at the U.S./Mexico border points to significant divides on the immigration issue.

Following media reports of harrowing conditions at a Texas border station, Russell Moore, president of the Southern Baptist Ethics and Religious Liberty Commission, tweeted, “The reports of the conditions for migrant children at the border should shock all of our consciences. Those created in the image of God should be treated with dignity and compassion, especially those seeking refuge from violence back home. We can do better than this.”

Others, including Liberty University President Jerry Falwell, Jr. and Texas pastor Jack Graham, took issue with Moore’s tweet. Graham defended the work of border agents and churches ministering at the border and invited Moore to visit the border with him. He also added, “Just to clarify…reasonable people know we have a humanitarian crisis at/border but to suggest that immigrants are not treated with dignity & respect is wrong & plays to secular press who blame America for the problem. We r all very concerned and many of us are trying to help.”

‘We could no longer look away’
Southern Baptist pastor Alan Cross reflects on how a graphic photo of a father and daughter who drowned while trying to cross from Mexico into Texas “jolted the nation awake.” Editor’s note: Link includes disturbing images.

‘Every effort at reform has been overridden or ignored’
Focus on the Family founder James Dobson describes horrifying conditions at the border and blames Democrat lawmakers for impeding President Trump’s efforts to improve the situation. “The border could be fixed, but there are very few in authority who seem to care,” Dobson said.

‘Like we have never seen before’
Speaking to a group of conservative Christian activists, Vice President Mike Pence confirmed the reality of a crisis at the border but advocated different policies than those espoused by Democratic candidates for president. “Those who would advocate open borders, free health care for illegal immigrants and making illegal immigration legal are making it easier for human traffickers to mistreat poor and vulnerable families,” Pence said.

‘We want to look away. But let’s not.’
Five Christian leaders, including author and Texas pastor Max Lucado, lament the conditions at the border and the suffering of children and families.

Sources: Associated Press, Christian Post, Religion News Service, Christianity Today

By Autumn Wall

Family vacation on the water

It’s summertime, and that means family vacation! The danger in vacation is that we tend to check out of every part of life—and that’s not helpful for Christians. Here are a few ways to keep Christ at the center of your time away.

1. Build time with Jesus into your day. Read through a Bible book with your family, or talk about what you’re studying individually. For kids, take along some Bible videos or search for a kid-focused devotional to watch together.

2. Pray together (not just over your food). Ask each person to share one thing they are struggling with in their relationship with God, and one way they are doing well. Don’t critique or lecture, just pray with them for what is on their hearts. And don’t forget to share yours too. Kids need to hear that parents struggle, but they take it to Jesus.

3. Visit a church! Find a Bible-teaching church in the area where you’re vacationing and attend worship there. Teach your children that gathering with the people of God is not something we do because we know and love the people, but because we know and love Jesus.

4. Plan a one-hour outreach. Share Jesus on the beach; take a homeless person to lunch; create encouraging notes to give to waiters, gas station attendants, or hotel hosts.

5. Secretly pay for someone’s meal. Leave a note that says, “Enjoy your lunch today on us! We are praying for you.” Then pray for them!

Autumn Wall and her husband are planting a church in Indianapolis. She is coauthor with her mother, Diana Davis, of “Across the Street and Around the World: Ideas to Spark Missional Focus” (New Hope Publishers).